Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009)

Translation: Fat Cop Fall Down, Funny! Paul Blart: Mall Cop is a cheap Die Hard remake featuring a gang of criminals who take hostages during a Christmastime robbery, only to be thwarted by an overlooked patron they didn’t expect to be in the building. Instead of cleaning out the Nakatomi Tower, the evil masterminds in Mall Cop take […]

Twilight (2008)

For a movie about ancient feuds between rival vampire families and werewolves, Twilight is painfully dull. Unlike Underworld, a film with the same premise, there’s no action or excitement. This might be because the film is presented from the perspective of the most boring high school girl in the history of the universe. Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) has […]

Tammy and the T-Rex (1994)

If there’s one thing we can learn from Tammy and the T-Rex, it’s that love is at its strongest in the face of adversity. This film tells the incredibly useless story of Michael (played by Paul Walker, RIP), a young man who has his brain transplanted into a robotic dinosaur’s body, and his attempt to reconcile […]

Julie and Jack (2003)

Ladies and gentlemen, we are pleased to present Julie and Jack! The directorial debut of James Nguyen, who would later helm the b-movie masterpiece Birdemic. This one has everything you would expect from Nguyen, from an aimless love story to endless corporate sales meetings. Not to mention costumes like these. Jack Livingstone (Justin Kunkle) is a down on […]

The Room Tribute (2010)

Indeed, it is a beautiful day, Johnny! Thanks to this wonderful game created by Tom Fulp, Johnny Utah and Chris O’Neil, that is. Now drop everything and play it here. The Room Tribute is is a retro-style point n’ click adventure game that allows the player to step into Johnny’s shoes and really LIVE the story of The Room! […]

Showgirls (1995)

Showgirls tells the story of switchblade-toting, orphan hitchhiker Nomi Malone (Elizabeth Berkley) and her commendable ambition to someday become a successful naked dancer on stage in the Las Vegas strip. Who hasn’t had such a wholesome, family friendly dream? She’s a six-mood-swing-a-minute type of girl, screaming like a defiant teenager one moment and making out with strange women the […]

SceneStudy – Cars Don’t Fly

“Your chute is guided by GPS! You don’t have to do anything!” Dear Furious 7 writers: a solid effort, but that line does not convince me skydiving in cars is plausible. “Cars Don’t Fly!” – Paul Walker, Furious 7 – I know, Furious 7 is just a dumb action movie, and maybe I shouldn’t take it as seriously […]

Furious 7 (2015)

“You ever heard the saying, the enemy of my enemy is my friend?” “I don’t got friends. I got family.” Does anyone remember the first movie in this series? The Fast and the Furious? It tells the story of an undercover FBI agent infiltrating a group of street racer thugs who steal dvd players from […]

Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)

Before it was a movie, or even a book for that matter, Fifty Shades of Grey was posted online by author E L James as an internet fan fiction. Using the internet handle ‘Snowqueen’s Icedragon,’  James was originally writing her kinky story using characters from The Twilight Saga books. Halfway through writing, she decided to change […]

After Last Season (2009)

DISCLAIMER: Heed these words. Heed them well: Don’t ever watch this movie.  INT. AFTER LAST SEASON SET – DAY Script in hand, Actor JASON KULAS approaches writer/director MARK REGION. JASON Hey, Mark, you mind if I run something by you?  MARK Anytime.  JASON I’m just wondering if we can fill in the other side of […]